On today's walk I was very aware of how my body was reacting to the walk, or more precisely, how it was reacting to the act of collecting "trash". Maybe because I had been reading about the MS-13 gang, one of the most dangerous gangs in the country centered in LA but also has a presence in Langley Park. I could really feel how tense and nervous I was. I put my head down and searched trying not to make eye contact or let anyone see me picking up stuff. I had this sense that I did not belong there. It's not a new awareness, I've felt this since the first time I walked through Langley Park. It's funny how it's only a few miles from Takoma Park but feels like a different country. Then again, I don't really fit in Takoma Park either, hence, the day three "word of the day" DISPLACEMENT. I think a big part of it is that I'm picking up trash. I can't help wondering what people are thinking of me as they pass by in their cars or follow behind me on the sidewalk. Probably no one cares, but it does make me think about the concepts of value and power and how it reflects in the way we identify with ourselves and others. I feel uncomfortable because I subconciously identify the act of picking up other people's trash with homelessness or "poorness". In a way, my art is part of that conversation, the sacred and the profane, value and non value. I'm interested in the things we as a society throw away. It reflects what our society deems "valuable" and "invaluable". I've always wanted to be an Archeologist since I was little, funny how life works.
Today was a good collecting day. I found a big shiny smashed aluminum tray, a couple more flare wires, another 7/11 neon orange pizza box, a great smashed side view car mirror with a cool black pattern on the back, a silver soup spoon, two wood pieces with white and brown paint on them, a broken wood umbrella handle, a couple of lead tire weights to add to the growing collection, a black rubber flip flop sole, some odds and ends plastic pieces, one lonely blue puzzle piece that made me think of my Grandma, she loved putting puzzles together, as well as good metaphor for displacement.
On my walk today, I saw a lot of those "pine" scented, pine tree shaped, car air fresheners, in varying degrees of decay, along the sidewalks. I thought how ironic it is that these "pine tree" "air fresheners" are tossed into nature and pollute the very thing that they are meant to fondly remind us of. So I thought wouldn't it be interesting to photograph each one and then do a large photo montage of all of them. But then I thought there is so much of that going on these days in the art world. Do I really need to bring more irony to the art world? It's very tempting though and once again that word "displacement" comes to mind.
I took a photo of a pile of decayed cat on the sidewalk in front of Value Village. All that was left was a pile of bones and black fur. I had seen this cat the day it was killed, about three weeks or so ago, it was lying along the road, it looked like it had just been hit, it was pure black lying on the pure black tar of the road. I remember thinking how weird it was to see a dead kitten just lying there in full view as people walked and drove by. It's something you see all the time in your car and don't really think much of it, but it's different when you walk, there's nothing to "protect" you from it, it's right there in your face. When I walked home that afternoon, it had been run over again and it's bright pink guts were lying there alongside it. The colors were shocking and strangely beautiful. The bright pink contrasting with the black fur and the black tar on the road. I remember thinking that I wish I would have taken a photograph of it "before" and "after" but I didn't because I thought the person walking behind me and the people in the cars passing by would think I was weird. I think this project will be good for me. My dad use to say, "You care too much about what other people think"; I guess I'm still working through that one.
